Why don’t you want to go to work? Why is it a lingering twenty minutes before you drag yourself out of bed, and motivate your feet enough to walk to the nearest restroom to begin your day? You may be the one that can get up, but lags in the bathroom, and may run late almost everyday…is this a coincidence? I think it is safe to say that we all know it is not a coincidence, and that the real reason is, you just don’t want to do it.

From age of 4 or 5 until you retire, you are most likely lead down the weekly path of early wake-up, monotonous day work, daily burnout, eat, “relax” or brain numbing for some, and then bed to do it again. Many times when this happens, what I have found is that you have been met with defeat, injustice, or worse, a lack to go on. It could be because you crave more out of life, it could be because your boss doesn’t like you or the promotions will never be yours, but even then, it could just be because you are mentally unhealthy.

Yes, our lives are a manifestation of our inner feelings, and though this seems strange, in loss of self™ you really have to pay attention. You have to see how your dark feelings of yourself and life illuminate your face, and the “desire to go on” breaks through the cracks at the worst times. You may keep a great face, don’t get me wrong (you hold it well is not a compliment), but in this dark feeling, or feeling of defeat, you have the risk of deeply losing yourself.

Loss of self™ is something that is tied to a negative event, life transition, or PTSD experience, but once you start to accept this as your identity, or something that “just is”, you can be lead down a darker hole that believes this is it and this is who I am. The truth is you were never this person, you changed into this person. Another truth is that emotions are to flow like the tides, and that means after a while you should be able to see the light. If you are stuck feeling there is no light, then you have gone down this hole too far.

I know, I have been there; crying, knowing I did what I knew how to, doing what I was asked, and even more, but what I believed after I felt the rejections and pains of not knowing where to go, was finally giving up. It was as if it wasn’t worth going on. I felt that it was better to kill that aspect of myself, than to keep fighting for a dream that others were killing or ignoring me about. This is not the way though! The reason I share this is that when I gave up, I became more upset with my situation and myself- someone described it as obvious depression, but it was my tactic of protection. Let me remind you again, you don’t have to do this!

If you don’t feel like getting up in the morning, you need to know why: is it the darker hole, not changing emotions like tides, or is it that you know you deserve more? It may be hard to face the truth, and scary, but you have to know you were made for more, this is not it, and that your purpose is calling you. In the midst of being hard, and falling into the triggers of loss of self™ while pursuing your purpose, remember that you have control over your Mental Health. More importantly though, you have control over your Spiritual Health.

If your spirit is full and fruit producing, you have a fighting chance. Take the challenge, and start knowing why you are going to work. If you need to, redefine what inspires you, or even just plainly remember that life, love, and time are borrowed. Why keep going to work and putting yourself through this when you already know you don’t want to? It’s time to change paths. It’s time to rediscover yourself, break from the darkness with a new reason to work, and then love doing it!

Let’s Continue The Resolution

PS: if you know someone struggling, in loss of self, going through heartbreak, or needing to understand love, share this resource with them!