When I was growing up, I was not the best dater (you can read more in this book or this one), but I was trying to find love for myself. I actually was rather quick in judgement, once not staying because someone could not pronounce “sh” and it drove me nuts, once because someone loved me too much and I didn’t feel the same, but I also stayed around for people who would not date me, or keep me as a hidden secret. I returned for people who were not treating me right, nor wanting to be solely with me in the same capacity as I wanted. See, as a Lost Soul searching for love, I found relationships don’t last, and if they do there is an unknown, but accepted end date in the horizon. Astonishingly enough, others who treated me poorly were confused why I wouldn’t stay, as I finally stood up for myself, but like the accepted end date, there has to be a day when you realize that your current methods aren’t working. There has to be a time to recognize that your current methods may keep your head above, but your heart is below, and to Move Forward in Love!™ your heart has to be above the drowning waters as well.

Later in life, still pursing love, I met someone and wanted to try with them, but it was different. There was a gut feeling the first time I met them, and all other things seemed less important, but what about my past? In the past, I had learned that relationships were short, they were volatile, and I normally ended up hurt, so I would look for the next person to ensure my vacancy of “relationship” were filled. Do you relate to any of this? Some guys don’t have this guilt or baggage, but I feel as women we do because we are taught to be monogamous and await the guy who will rescue us, but men are taught to test the waters and only rescue one girl. How do you stop this broken ways of dating?

Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord, and the Lord shall be his trust. And he shall be as a tree, which is planted over waters, which sendeth his roots to moisture; and it shall not dread, when heat shall come; and the leaf thereof shall be green, and it shall not be moved in the time of dryness, neither any time it shall fail to make fruit.

Jeremiah 17:7‭-‬8 WBMS

As someone dating today, there is so much to be aware of and look for, but the most important things are “Who are you?”, and “Who do you want the world to see?“. As I read a Bible Study this morning, I was met with how Egypt was just materialistic, and how we must have our trust in God. This lead me to read a little bit of Micah in the Bible, and I found two chapters that really stood out. Chapter 6 is about Egypt, with GOD asking the Israelites in verse 3, what did I do to you, or how did I wrong you; then in verse 4, Egypt is referenced again with how Israelites were enslaved to them. My mind clicked to the fact that God is saying, I brough you out of materialism with a “trinity” style leadership (Moses, Aaron, Mary/Miriam) so you don’t have to live of the world, so why do you act like I did something to you and reject me? Unfortunately, the Israelites, like myself, didn’t see it this way, so how do you not make the same mistakes I did by focusing on void-filling and just trying to find love while dating?

Following verse 8, “I shall show to thee…what is good…act rightly, or with justice, and to love mercy, or and to love mercifully, and to be busy, or committed, to walk with thy God.”. In retrospect, I probably did hurt someone with my attitude towards dating, so what can you do to change what is happening in your dating world?

• Go back and apologize or explain why you acted a certain way towards someone, even if it is years later- guilt has no time
• Continue to allow your soul to desire the ripened figs (Micah 7:1) and discern who will truly love you correctly (mind, body, spirit/soul)
• Act like someone with morals and standards- I know intimacy is a commonality these days, but make yourself stand out by holding back
• Use justful taste when judging who to date; at times spirits recognize, though eyes deny attraction, and personalities can override a “type”
• Be graceful when you are dumped, rejected or let go because that person is searching for someone that will truly love them correctly
• Focus on God, and what He is asking of you because satan will call you by your errors at any time, so don’t give him a reason to

In final thought, you are the one who can change the dating world, but you have to know who you are, and be brave enough to stand out. If you change your ways, you may find you get slack from those at home (Micah 7:6) or friends, but if your current methods haven’t been working, it’s time to evaluate you, and realign with God’s “what is good”. You may find that in alignment “He shall turn again, and have mercy on us. He shall put down our wickedness, and shall cast far into deepness the sea all our sin.” (Micah 7:19). So, if sins are in the sea of life, and this same water is purified by God, when finding the (dating) fish in the sea, recognize God has already had fishers of men to fine the good ones for you.